TERIMA KASIH DAUN KELADI MUSIM KEDUA

25 Disember 2008....

Tarikh yang selama ini aku nantikan.. takut ade, gementar ade, gembira ade... ntha la.. bercampur baur perasaan aku padi tarikh keramat ini....

Opps nanti dulu.. bukan Ooops I did it again lagu nyayian Britney Lembing tu... Kalo korang ingat aku gembira, gementar atau takut sebab mungkin Santa Claus akan muncul depan aku... Korang ni memang lucah (ayat yg matyo suka gunakan).. hahahaha.. salah tekaan korang tu...

25 Disember 2008... Terima kasih yg x terhingga kepada semua yang telah menjayakan sebuah ikatan janji antara 2 insan sama ada secara langsung atau tidak....

Terima kasih yang x terhingga dari kami.. Ntah la nak bals mcm mana pun x tau.. tp kan korang dah dapat goodie bag tu kan...? kire orait la kan.. hahah

Untuk korang yang x berkesempatan menghadiri majlis ikatan janji kami.. jangan risau.. sedikit gambar yang menceritakan suasana hari pertunangan tersebut... terima kasih kepada professional photographer aku.. credit to matyo.. http://yourrnextexit.blogspot.com

(perah otak)

1. If you are right handed, you will tend to chew your food on your right side. If you are left handed, you will tend to chew your food on your left side.
2. If you stop getting thirsty, you need to drink more water. For when a human body is dehydrated, its thirst mechanism shuts off.
3. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.
4. Your tongue is germ free only if it is pink. If it is white there is a thin film of bacteria on it.
5. The Mercedes-Benz motto is “Das Beste oder Nichts” meaning “the best or nothing”.
6. The Titanic was the first ship to use the SOS signal.
7. The pupil of the eye expands as much as 45 percent when a person looks at something pleasing.
8. The average person who stops smoking requires one hour less sleep a night.
9. Laughing lowers levels of stress hormones and strengthens the immune system. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day.
10. The roar that we hear when we place a seashell next to our ear is not the ocean, but rather the sound of blood surging through the veins in the ear.
11. Dalmatians are born without spots.
12. Bats always turn left when exiting a cave.
13. The ‘v’ in the name of a court case does not stand for ‘versus’, but for ‘and’ (in civil proceedings) or ‘against’ (in criminal proceedings).
14. Men’s shirts have the buttons on the right, but women’s shirts have the buttons on the left.
15. The owl is the only bird to drop its upper eyelid to wink. All other birds raise their lower eyelids.
16. The reason honey is so easy to digest is that it’s already been digested by a bee.
17. Roosters cannot crow if they cannot extend their necks.
18. The color blue has a calming effect. It causes the brain to release calming hormones.
19. Every time you sneeze some of your brain cells die.
20. Your left lung is smaller than your right lung to make room for your heart.
21. The verb “cleave” is the only English word with two synonyms which are antonyms of each other: adhere and separate.
22. When you blush, the lining of your stomach also turns red.
23. When hippos are upset, their sweat turns red.
24. The first Harley Davidson motorcycle was built in 1903, and used a tomato can for a carburetor.
25. The lion that roars in the MGM logo is named Volney.
26. Google is actually the common name for a number with a million zeros.
27. Switching letters is called spoonerism. For example, saying jag of Flapan, instead of flag of Japan.
28. It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it.
29. The attachment of the human skin to muscles is what causes dimples.
30. There are 1,792 steps to the top of the Eiffel Tower.
31. The sound you hear when you crack your knuckles is actually the sound of nitrogen gas bubbles bursting.
32. Human hair and fingernails continue to grow after death.
33. It takes about 20 seconds for a red blood cell to circle the whole body.
34. The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.
35. Most soccer players run 7 miles in a game.
36. The only part of the body that has no blood supply is the cornea in the eye. It takes in oxygen directly from the air.
37. Every day 200 million couples make love, 400,000 babies are born, and 140,000 people die.
38. In most watch advertisements the time displayed on the watch is 10:10 because then the arms frame the brand of the watch (and make it look like it
is smiling).
39. Colgate faced big obstacle marketing toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries. Colgate translates into the command “go hang yourself.”
40. The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning its head are the rabbit and the parrot.
41. Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
42. The average person laughs 13 times a day.
43. Do you know the names of the three wise monkeys? They are:Mizaru(See no evil), Mikazaru(Hear no evil), and Mazaru(Speak no evil)
44. Women blink nearly twice as much as men.
45. German Shepherds bite humans more than any other breed of dog.
46. Large kangaroos cover more than 30 feet with each jump.
47. Whip makes a cracking sound because its tip moves faster than the speed of sound.
48. Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the two hapless protesters to death.
49. If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle; if the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural cause.
50. The human heart creates enough pressure while pumping to squirt blood 30 feet!!

The world is AWESOME...

Johan K*****G berdiri??? Tak Senonoh Punye Budak

Aku baru bangun tido... terus surf internet looking for ideas untuk blog aku ni... tak semena - mena aku terbuka web ni... Fikiran ku masih lagi kusut.... kosong.... malas.... pening... Argghhhhhh aku malas bangun pagi..... tak senonoh punye blogger...

Nah aku tinggal kan ruangan ini untuk korang sendiri lihat dan buat penilaian

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weird toilet signs around the world. i wonder whether we do have one or not in Malaysia... (curiosity)

Still looking for one way street sign........Pak Man Telo help me finding it...

*ah, baru aku teringat... sejak dari tadi lagi aku menahan gelora di jiwa... untuk melakukan apa yg si Johan sedang lakukan... tp dalam keadaan yang lebih sopan... chow dulu... aku sudah tidak tahan lagi... tuluuuuuuunnnnnnn......

Ada Apa dengan Chewing Gum ost Ada Apa dengan dot dot dot....

Bapaku pulang dari kota
Bapaku belikan kereta
Kereta kecil warna merah
Boleh ku bawa ke sekolah

Poon...poon..poon...poon...poon...poon...poon...poon...poon...

Kereta kecil ku berbunyi
.............
(lupa lirik.. aisyeh.. mcm mana boleh lupa lirik ni...)

Ahmad Kamil.. tolong saya dengan lirik ini........


Lagu ini pernah saya nyayikan semasa saya berumur ** tahun sambil diirigi petikan (bukan petikan karangan, bukan sedara betik atau pun bukan sejenis ikan) gitar karan Mohd Yo... oooo yeaaaahhhhh

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Matyo dan Toto Naritanya....

"Esok pg dalam pukul 10 aku sampai rumah kau"..... kata2 matyo yg masih lagi aku ingat... die cakap ke? xdelah YM je....

Esoknye, pukul 930pagi dh terpacak depan rumah aku... seb baik dah mandi kalo x kantoi bangun lambat...

Antara isi percakapan aku dengan Mohd Yo penulis blog next exit

Aku: Wei, meh ar masuk dulu....

Mohd Yo: Ilek2, isap rokok dulu....

Aku: OK2 aku pakai baju dulu...(pening nak pakai apa ek...)

Seketika kemudian Mohd Yo pun masuk dalam rumah aku....

Aku: Minum dulu... Nasi Lemak cik Rokiah pun ade ni.. ko nak sebungkus?

Mohd Yo: Apa salahnya (dengan muka malu2 kucing siam Pakcik Salim)

Aku: Aku ni pagi2 kene minum air sejuk, kan ko dh bace dlm blog aku kan??

Mohd Yo: Ha' ah..

Aku: Eh, aku dah habis, jom....

Mohd Yo: Jom....


(entri lagu suspen.......)

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cuba lihat sudut kanan belah bawah TV anda bile cite rona roni makaroni ditayangkan.....

Bersambung..... (aku x pernah tgk Rona Roni Makaroni tp pernah makan makaroni)

- Credit -

lagu twinkle2 little star nyayian Jalil Hamid.......

Bila Makcik Maimun Mula Berbicara......

Kenapa gula- gula getah susah nak di hadamkan.... ermm, aku pun x tau sebab apa gula2 getah susah nak hadam....awak tahu???

Siapa kenal Abdullah Sani?

KU MILIKMU...

Awek aku bukan mcm Eira Syazira dalam cerita Ku Milikmu kat TV3 jam 9:00 malam hingga 10:00 malam.. Awekku adalah awekku... xpakai spek besar yg tu yang penting....

kuikuikui.......

IKAN EMAS KE IKAN MAS???

Entri kali ni bukan berkisar (bukan blender-mesin pengisar) tentang mari mengeja... hatta subjek tatabahasa pun bukan..

Kali ni aku nak bagi tau satu cerita kat korang pasal Goldfish aku... tp sbelum tu aku nak mintak tolong ngan korang... bahasa melayu nye Ikan Emas ke Ikan Mas???

Dalam 2 minggu yg lepas aku pegi pet shop... tgk punye tengok punye tgk... brp banyak tengok daa... aku beli la seekor seekor oranda goldfish kaler hitam.... dalam akuarium aku memang dah ade seekor oranda goldfish yg kaler keemas- emasan.. 24 karat tu... kalo g gadai, kaya aku....

Sampai je kat rumah, aku ltk la ikan tu dalam akuarium... tp makhluk paling seksi tu masih lg ada dalam plastik dek kerana menurut arahan tokey pet shop tu... tipikal old chinese berbaju pagoda berseluar pendek dan berselipar jepun.... die cakap lps 3-4 jam br masukkan dalam air.. biar ikan tu sesuaikan diri dengan temperature akuarium aku.....

Satu lagi, tokey cine tu pesan srh tukar air dalam 50% then masukkan garam (sesedap rasa.. jangan sampai darah tinggi dah la ikan tu die cakap)

Aku pun kire oraitla.. mmg ikut apa yg die bg tau.. So, selepas 4 jam aku pun lepaskan lah ikan baru dr plastik ke dalam akuarium.. dah cukup selesa kot.. aku rasa la.....

Esoknye, aku tgk yg goldfish lama tu perut dah ke atas.. aku fikir.. nak show off kat orang baru la tu... cam buat tarian berirama plak... ah, lantak korang la.....

Ptg yg sama aku tengok yg baru pun sama buat renang berirama gak.. perut dua- dua ekor dah ke atas.......

Cepat ko belajar ikan... aku dah 25 tahun ni pun tak reti lg nak berenang berirama....

Keesokkannye, aku tgk yang kaler emas tu dah mati......Sedey gile rasenye.. br 7 bulan ikan tu aku beli dah mati.. mati muda plak tu...

Aku pun tanye la ayah aku, Abah, apsal ikan tu mati... selamba blue hyppo je ayah aku jawab.. terkejut kot tengok nigger masuk kolam....

aku terkedu diam seribu bahasa.....

Siot je......

TERIMA KASIH DAUN KELADI

Sebenarnya sampai ke hari ni aku masih belum mengerti lagi apsal, orang selalu cakap kat dalam surat "TERIMA KASIH DAUN KELADI".....

Boleh ke kita ucapkan terima kasih kat daun keladi???

Kalau boleh, macam mana daun keladi tu jawab??? (entri lagu ExposeMistik)

Ntahla... aku memang tak paham.... mintak maaf Cikgu Zuraidah...... dulu lupa nak tanye kat cikgu soalan ni...

Aku sebenarnya nak ucapkan terima kasih bukan kat daun keladi.. tapi kat sume orang yang pernah melawat blog aku ni.. dan mereka yang mengajar aku mcm mana nak membangun kan blog ni.....

Tu je... Terima Kasih wahai pengguna jalan raya sekalian.....

Ishh..Ishh.. Malunye Aku kat Makcik tu.....

Selamat Pagi Malaysia... sebuah rancangan terbitan RTM yang tidak pernah ku tontoni.. hanya tahu kewujudannya melalui intisari rancangan yang dipaparkan di dada akhbar je... surat khabar pun ada dada ke??? kaki ngan tangan dia mana?... nipple nye???

Hua Hua Hua.. bukan rancangan terbitan Astro yg menampilkan pak2 lawak.....cam apek, nabil...etc...

Peringatan; bukan mahu bercerita tentang rancangan tv kegemaran mak cik rosnah ngan pak cik dollah tp......

Ada lah satu pagi tu... yg boleh dikatakan x berapa nk pagi dah sebab 2-3 minit lg dah nak pukul 12 tgh hr... aku pegi la ke kedai seorang makcik ni... selalu pegi kedai die tp xtau nama dia.. teruk kan? ah pedulikan... bukan mak cik aku pun...

Macam biasa la aku ambik senaskah surat khabar harian Metro yg jd surat khabar plg laris di Malaysia.. rasa bangga pun ada dalam diri sebab aku merupakan salah seorang pelaris paper ni... hahaha dengan berita harian......

Pastu kat kaunter aku bg tau makcik tu.. (makcik yg aku tak tau nama dia).. tolong bagi sekotak marlboro lights 14... damn it bad habit yg masih menebal dalam diri aku... berapa kali dh try nk berenti... hampa.......

Makcik tu suke senyum.. aku pun senyum balik la... tp takut pun ada gak sebab nanti kene gosip ngan org sekliling... 10 ringgit dik... kata makcik tu sambil tersenyum lg... mungkin selalu tonton iklan senyumlah.. senyumlah kat TV 1 kot.. alaaa yg pakcik muka masam tu.. last2 senyum gigi cam haram tu...

Aku pun ambik wallet aku bukan wall-e citer katun tu... ambik duit nk bg kat makcik tu tanpa melihat isi kandungan dompet aku..... tibe2 aku tgk anak lelaki makcik tu yg nama pun aku x tau tergelak.. makcik tu pun sama.....

Hairan lah aku.. nk gelak gak ke x payah... makcik tu pun cakap; "dik, 10 ringgit semuanya"... ye lah aku jawab.

Sekarang baru aku tangok duit td......

Aku dengan selamba badak nye (badak blue hyppo tu pun x seselamba mcm aku) telah mengeluarkan seringgit nk bayar kat makcik tu.. patut la 2 beranak tu tergelak... aku pun buat2 la alasan.. ish tersilap plak.. mcm mana boleh silap ni.. sambil mengeluarkan nota RM 10....

Sejak dari hari tu sampai ke entri ni ditulis.. haram aku xjejak kaki kat kedai makcik tu lg....

(mari kite ramai2 cakap aaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwww malunye saye)

Esok Hari Selasa.....

Anda pernah terfikir x yg kadang kala ada sesetengah perkara yang anda buat sekarang (25tahun) bunyinya agak pelik...... pelik bagi diri ku.. ntah la....

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1. Suka main Astropop kat laptop aku.. tapi kalau kalah mesti yg selalu jadi mangsa tetikus aku (permainan ini memerlukan penguna yg cekap mengendalikan mouse)
2. Ada postpaid, tapi lg selesa ber SMS... ingat lagi kalo member aku tanye apsal ko pakai post paid, dengan selamba aku jawab, nnt senang call orang. Padahal, masih lagi SMS...
3. Masih lagi meminati siri Doraemon.. kadang kala bergaduh ngan anak buah aku pasal nak tengok Doraemon kat Astro Ceria setiap Jumaat.... umur je dah 25 tahun... anda bagaimana?
4. Pernah x kluar dr rumah selama 3 hari in a row.... rase cam hebat la.... Alasan, malas nak keluar...
5. Hantar SMS kat awek aku tanye " Awak buat apa?" padahal, jawapan nye aku mmg dah tahu... keje la...
6. Kluar jumpe awek aku pukul 5 ptg, pukul 6 petang dah ajak balik... terpinga2 perempuan tu.. aik, xkan nak balik dah kot.. selamba aku jawab, dah gelap dah wak, jom la balik....
7. Gosok gigi 2 kali setiap kali mandi.. aku pun xtau sebab apa... korang ade penyelesaian x?
8. Kalau lepak mapley mesti pesan " Ane, Nescafe ais satu" biarpun dalam hati sebelum buat order, aku xnak order nescafe ais...
9. Paling x suka minum air suam... batuk ke demam ke selsema ke.... aku bantai minum ais.. pagi2 buta aku blh minum ais... tapi mak aku ckp x elok minum ais.. terpaksa la aku ikut... kadang2 je aku ikut...
10. Suka selesaikan Jumbo word search.. buku aku beli kat popular book store... kat bahagian belakang ada jawapan.. aku cuba untuk menahan diriku dari melihat jawapan, kadang2 terkantoi gak....

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Ada lagi beberapa perkara yang aku rasa macam pelik la untuk aku buat tu bunyi nye macam pelik je... tapi biarkan ia menjadi rahsia antara aku dan diriku.... Siti pun nyanyi lagu biarlah rahsia....

(bunyi cengkerik)

Hari Isnin Malam Selasa....

Hari Isnin, malam Selasa.... Malam Discovery Channel se dunia... aku suka tgk channel 551 malam ni... tiap2 minggu malam yg sama mmg channel ni menjadi kegemaran aku...

aku sendiri x mengerti.. tp memang aku suke tengok Man VS Wild dengan Dirty Jobs with Mike Rowe... Sejuk (cool??) kan....

Tu je yang aku nk kongsi....

best kan.. cube korang tgk la rancangan tu....

Entri Pasal Penurunan Harga Minyak....

Semalam petang aku keluar berjumpa dengan kawan ku di sebuah pusat membeli belah.. sudah agak petang ketika itu....

Aku sampai di pusat membeli belah (nama dirahsiakan atas sebab2 keselamatan) tepat jam 4:45 petang... selepas mengharungi kesesakan jalan raya yang amat membosankan... (aku memang benci pada traffic jam... why i hate it? u know why..)

Ni bukan nak cerita pasal apa kami buat masa berjumpa tp sebelum dan selepas kami berjumpa.... dalam perjalanan, aku tengok perut kereta ku agak berkeroncong, atas dasar perikekeretaan semasa dalam perjalanan, aku berhenti di stesen minyak Petronas.. (support barangan Malaysia) dan terus mengisi minyak sebanyak rm 50.....

Sesudah selesai tugasan tersebut, aku terus menghidupkan kereta aku dan meneruskan perjalanan..... Barulah rasa best sikit tengok perut kereta aku dh berisi... bunyi2 keroncong pun dah hilang.....

habis setakat ni....

keesokan (betul ke ejaan tu.. rase cam salah je.. ah pedulikan je..) harinye

Petang tadi (15 disember 2008 jam 1721) tgh dok bosan2 YM dan kawan2.. tibe dapat SMS... buat pengetahuan pembaca, aku merupakan pelanggan berita bernama dan the star melalui telefon bimbit sejak lebih kurang setahun yang lalu... save duit aku dr beli surat khabar hari2.. at least aku tahu latest news se hari awal dari surat khabar... (ingatkan citer Early Edition) kalo x ingat boleh tgk kat AXN ch 701 jam 6 ptang......

Isi kandungan berita SMS tu bg tau yg Pak Lah - our beloved??? Prime Minister mengumumkan yg mulai 16 Disember 2008 harga minyak dan diesel turun 10sen lagi... wah aku melompat kegembiraan.... tengah dok syok melompat2 kegirangan tum tiba2 aku tersentak... damn man, semmalam aku dah isi minyak kete..... 50 ringgit plak tu.. rugi la seposen aku... xpe la........

Mungkin pengajaran buat diriku...
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nanti aku nak tunggu sampai dapat minyak free baru aku nk g pump station.... arghhhhh

Hinder-Better than Me

I think you can do much better than me
After all the lies that I made you believe
Guilt kicks in and I start to see
The edge of the bed
Where your nightgown used to be
I told myself I won't miss you
But I remember
What it feels like beside you
I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

While looking through your old box of notes
I found those pictures I took
That you were looking for
If there's one memory I don't want to lose
That time at the mall
You and me in the dressing room
I told myself I won't miss you
But I remember
What it feels like beside you
I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

The bed I'm lying in is getting colder
Wish I never would've said it's over
And I can't pretend... I won't think about you when I'm older
Cause we never really had our closure
This can't be the end
I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastesI think you can do much better than me
After all the lies that I made you believe
Guilt kicks in and I start to see
The edge of the bed
Where your nightgown used to be
I told myself I won't miss you
But I remember
What it feels like beside you
I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

While looking through your old box of notes
I found those pictures I took
That you were looking for
If there's one memory I don't want to lose
That time at the mall
You and me in the dressing room
I told myself I won't miss you
But I remember
What it feels like beside you
I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

The bed I'm lying in is getting colder
Wish I never would've said it's over
And I can't pretend... I won't think about you when I'm older
Cause we never really had our closure
This can't be the end
I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me
I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me
(And I think you should know this)
(You deserve much better than me)
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me
I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me
(And I think you should know this)
(You deserve much better than me)

Monsoon Cup, finally...

"Pagi yang gelap kini sudah terang......" hari ni bgn tido aku sms mat yo tanye die.. "weh wak mende? Nk g dok tgk monsoon cup ari ni?" (actual sms yg aku hantar kat die pg ni) ...... hahahah bukan seperti yg die tulis dlm blg die "dan + kebosanan duduk kat umah, aku roger Amir.. ajak turun ke Pulau Duyung.." (petikan dlm blog matyo)..... mane ade mung roger aku mat yo.. itu sume dusta belaka.. aku yg sms ko dulu... hahahahah... x baik tipu tau.. nanti Tuhan marah.... anyway, it was a fantastic moment la pi tgk monsoon cup tu evethough traffic jam cam haram ngan parking space yg kurang best... btol tak mat yo??? btol kan... kan ... kan??? hahahahahahah tahun depan ada rezeki, ada masa jom kita pi tgk monsoon cup..... here are some pictures taken at the Monsoon Cup... (ihsan dr camera Nikon SLR mat yo).... copy paste je.. camera sendiri x bawak...

" Datuk Peter Gilmor" yay... yay pakcik menang....

Ian Williams and his team champion world tour racing

Me with the champ of the race... kenal x?? tp bau xyah citer la... hahahaha

final race.... tahun depan pi tgk lg... nk ikut tak???

first time posting

hahahahhaha......salam to all of you... thank you cause dropping by to view and read my blog... first time blogging still need some guidance from all of you.. reason why start blogging??? ermmm, ntah la... mungkin sbb teruja kot after reading mat yo and sofi's blog.. hahahah terus click kat create blog and now, as u can see here is my blog..

"one way street" name of the blog.... think, some of u might be wondering why on the earth i'm choosing that name for my blog.. simple reason cause i think it's good... for me la..

ermm.. again, wish to thank you all cause willing to spend some of ur quality time for viewing and reading my blog... hope to learn more mcm mana nk berblogging neh from anda semua... go go chaiyook....